Knots

Knots on the pine board ceiling. Knots in my back.  The knot I'm hanging onto at the end of the thread.  Ok, it's not quite that bad....but not too far from it.  Say it with me now - "Her-nee-ate."  Follow that with "Shitballs."  You now have the  synopsis of my past week. A disk in my back went all whacko and shortly thereafter my mind followed.
Flat-assed, face-up and staring at the ceiling I've had my share of flashbacks and ephiphanies which I could share with you but they all come back to one simple bit of advice which is to live life and enjoy each day to the very fullest and to never turn down an opportunity or an invitation and party your ass off like there's no tomorrow and lay on your ass in the sun when it feels good and shout when you feel like it, laugh when something tickles you, avoid crying at all costs, wear whatever you want no matter how inappropriate it is, say what you feel, go where you want, don't answer questions if you don't want to, feel free to ask questions, take drumming lessons, "meep" your boss on the nose, do cartwheels in the rain, sit on the stoop of the house that just gave you candy when you're trick-or-treating and eat all your candy, talk in a foreign accent at midnight in Wal-Mart, wear fur if it keeps you warm and makes you smile, cut your hair or color your hair however you want, drink straight from the milk carton, smoke the last cigarette, help yourself to the last glass of wine without offering it to your company, show "too much cleavage", wear "too-high heels", go topless, go bottomless, make up a name when the barista at Starbucks asks for your name, have botox, go to an asian spa, smoke from a hooka, run in the rain, slam dance at least once so hard you get bruises, and feel totally freakin' free to write run-on sentences any friggin' time you want. 
Simple. Bit of advice.


 

Calendar Year

Funny how time goes faster, it seems, with each passing year.  It has been a year to the very date, I think, since I have written a post for my blog. Often it has come to mind, and often it has passed.  Nothing in particular brings me back to writing on this day.  No promises I make to maintain.  As I do on many mornings on my way to work, I thought about the things I want to do....the things I put on the back-burner.  The unimportant, self-indulgent, unnecessary things spawning mostly out of creativity that are at the bottom of the list.  Things saved for empty days when I have nothing to do, and then the female vocalist cried out through the car speakers".....better off dead....", and here I am.

Throughout the day, my head kept drifting off to my past year.  What has happened, what I was going to write.  I had some really good stories in my head this morning. Amazing what just a few hours can do.  When a friend and I were talking the other night, she complained to me that I seem to be always running.  I nodded my head in agreement, and immediately jumped up to refill our wine glasses, returning to the table with a full glass and a 'Now where were we?'

And so.....where were we? Ironically, the last time I wrote was after a hair show and ironically, I just attended the same annual show, coming out of it in a much better mental state as the last.  Thinking back, sometimes you just need a kick in the pants.  A year later, and my bruises have faded.  Not such a big deal afterall.

A couple of weeks ago, I made it to my favorite getaway on the Gulf.  It was great eventhough I did see some effects of the oil spill.  Honestly, it wasn't as bad as I was expecting.....even with being rushed home by a tropical storm. 

Each year brings life lessons.  Somehow, this year's lessons seem epic - as if I've entered into another chapter in life's journey.  Presumably, I've mellowed into what I can only refer to as 'middle-agedhood."  I can't say I'm overly exurberant about it although I'm not afraid to admit that I do feel some poise, some quiet and some wisdom.  I feel like I'm finally starting to see the forest for the trees, taking notice of the individual trees, admiring their strength and accepting their flaws.
My hope is that I keep this vision, portray it in my daily life and my work. My intent is to bring the things I find important to the front burner, if only for moments here and there. And with that, I leave you, for now.....